Tag Archives: Ram

Landslide by Fleetwood Mac

Well, I’ve been afraid of changing
‘Cause I’ve built my life around you
But time makes you bolder
Even children get older
And I’m getting older too

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Lie-alty

Just a random thought, I think it’s kind of weird how people rely so much on the words I say when most of the time I’m just being sarcastic and it’s their fault for believing me. But here’s the thing, the sequence is that I say something sarcastic and then they believe me. Does the fact that I didn’t point out that I was just joking make me a liar? Well, probably.

But then again, people hear what they wanna hear. I like to be specific with my statements, even if they end up meaning something else to those who hear them. A lot of people have such a hard time telling lies when I don’t, like it’s my second language. And I think this habit may have been developed from years ago, when I discovered that people can actually shut up as long as you say the things they want to hear. Most of the time, I don’t really like listening to other people and goddamn, I absolutely hate it whenever they pester me whenever they want to know something that I know, so I just tell them what they want to hear. Delicious lies. If they believe me, it’s their problem. If they fall for it, it’s not my problem. It’s not my problem because they never ask me if what I tell them is true, and by then I really would have told them the truth. I don’t really care what they think anyway, as long as they leave me alone.

But don’t get me wrong. I just wanted to contemplate on this because it suddenly came to me. I just figured I should discuss it here.

But what I’m about to say is the truth: just because I’m a first-class liar doesn’t mean I do it all the time. When it comes down to things that actually matter, as much as possible I never try to lie. And just because I tell people what they want to hear so that they’ll leave me alone doesn’t mean I don’t find comfort in the company of other people. I like engaging in all kinds of conversations, but I just want to focus most of the time. Focus on nothing, actually. Well, I can’t really understand myself either. Whether or not this is a lie, I’m actually not sure myself. I don’t want to exert effort into trying to figure it out, though.

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Holy Shit

Holy Shit

Holy Week pretty much went by more quickly than most weeks I had to go through, probably because I slept through most of it. The first half, though, comprised of our Computer Engineering seniors’ two-day field trip to a lot of places in mostly Central Luzon, which I really can’t recall that well anymore since it has already been days since it happened. Still, I had a great time. It’s the last time my colleagues and I can hang out like that as students.

But what really kept bugging my mind this week is holy shit. Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit. And by that, I mean, “Holy shit, I’m gonna graduate.”

I mean, can you imagine me, Ram, the loudmouthed, brutally frank, poor excuse of a human being, going out and being an engineer and even aspiring to study law? Goddamn. I am in way over my head. I jacked off all throughout college and now they’re letting me leave. I can’t imagine doing anything else other than smoke, insult people, crack dirty jokes and just basically slack off. Well, that’s actually what I did during my internship and that worked pretty well for me.

But I just can’t believe it. Holy shit. If all goes well, I’m gonna graduate, and I’m so scared and excited at the same time. I honestly have no idea what’s in store for me next, but I know I can jack off through it again. And I just can’t think of anything to say but, well…

Holy shit.

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